College: What I learned in my first year | KAT CHAT

Hi everyone!

Let's kick off Kat Chat right, shall we? Today I will be talking about college *cue cheering*

First I want to make clear that I am currently in my second year of college, so this post is essentially for all of you out there who have started college this year, or will be starting in the spring or next year!

College is a time for discovery, hard work, redirection, and learning about yourself. I have always been a very independent person (sometimes a little too much), and I believe that being so independent has made my transition into college a little easier. For those who are more dependent it becomes a little more tricky. Being dependent isn't necessarily a bad thing, however, it is important to learn that your life is what you make of it, and that there may not always be someone around to pick up the pieces for you or help you out. Again, I am not bashing those who are dependent on others, but let college teach you to stand on your own and become who you truly are!

Some thing I learned:

1). You don't have to become best friends with your roommate(s)

If you do, then that's fantastic and it's great that you have a friend to begin your college journey with! I believe that the media portrays college (especially for girls) as you move into your dorm, and will always be besties with your roommate. This is not always the case. I was placed into a dorm room by myself and had suitemates instead of an actual roommate, but I can tell you that I didn't become best friends with all of them immediately, but over time I gradually became friends with them. Not "joined at the hip" best friends, just friends with them. I really do like most of the girls that I shared a suite with.

Another thing- it is ok to not like your roommate. Sometimes you get paired up with someone and you two just don't have a connection. Again, this is fine. You are not entitled to like everyone you meet. I'm not preaching for you to go out there and hate your roommate(s)... I still think it's necessary to find something good in them, but it is not the end of the world if you don't have a strong connection with them. I, for one, had 2 additional suitemates that I didn't know at all. They were rarely there, but when they did return home they would make a mess, be noisy, rude, or would steal things. I did not have a good feeling about them. At first I felt extremely guilty for feeling this way, then I realized that it is a part of life and it's alright that I didn't care for them too much. We went our separate ways and left each other to our own business. Be civil, but don't expect to become the best of friends with everyone you live with.

2). Actually, you may not make any "best friends" at all.... well not just yet anyway

This is where patience comes in. There are sooooo many people at the same college that you attend, and sometimes you can feel so alone, even when surrounded by tons of people. Don't feel discouraged if you don't instantly click with someone. Friendships can take time, and honestly it is ok if you are friendly with people and consider them an acquaintance (or more than) before considering them your friend. As long as you are nice to people, and treat them how you what them to treat you, then you will have people to count on in no time. Patience my friend, patience.


3). Not all frat guys are scary

Again, the media plays a huge role in this. We (in general) have this preconceived idea that all frat guys are party animals, don't care about school, usually are the best looking, possibly too direct in a sexual sense, and are overall possibly a little douchey. This is not always true. Are there guys like this? YES. Are they always the guys in Fraternities? NO. I have met a few guys that are in fraternities that are absolutely nothing like this. I have also met guys that I would've never thought were in a fraternity, but are. Overall, don't believe everything that the media portrays to you. Not everything is like the movies. In terms of parties.. well, I couldn't even begin to tell you because I have never been to a party, let alone within 50 feet of one. Things may be different in that setting, I don't know. What I've observed has solely been through living in a dorm, and going to classes.

4). It is ok to not party... really

Speaking of parties..
This was one that I was nervous about. Unless if you are going to a "party school" then don't worry if you don't want to party. I can honestly say that I have never been to, or have wanted to attend a college party. I am not the party type, and when I tell people that they understand. Around here parties are quite "hush hush" and you can only get into one if invited. Fine by me, really.

5). same with drinking.. don't want to drink? that's cool too

Some people think it's quite admirable, really.

*click "read more" to view the rest



6). Yes, there is a LOT of homework

This one I expected, however I was surprised at just how many people were shocked by how much homework they had to do. In high school I was always on top of my assignments- I did them early and turned them all in. I'm guessing the people that were truly surprised didn't practice this in high school? I don't know. What I DO know is that yes, there is a lot of homework, no matter what your major is, or if you're taking what you assume is a "blow off class". Keep up on that work, it really adds up!

7). Attendance counts in college (well.. maybe)

This may not be applicable to all colleges/universities or professors, but a lot of my classes have taken attendance that is crucial to passing that class. I always heard people say that they can easily skip a class and not worry about their grade dropping (assuming that they do all the homework and prepare for tests) and I was honestly surprised that attendance counted towards my grade. Don't get me wrong- it's easy points if you are always there, but me being someone with medical issues it made me a little nervous that I may have to sacrifice my grade for my health. If you are someone in the same situation as me, do 2 things. 1. talk to them and tell your professor that you have medical problems, they are *usually* very understanding and 2. get a letter from a doctor that you are seeing that explains what your condition is, and that you may have to miss class for the sake of your health.

8). It is ok to admit that you want to go home

You know how some people go through that period in their life where they are embarrassed by their parents (thankfully I was never embarrassed by them!)? Well that time is over, now. In college people understand that you miss home, and your pet, and just want to be with your family. I have never felt ashamed saying to someone that I go home every weekend. People just get it. Some people have said that they wish that they were in my position to be able to drive 45 minutes and go home every weekend. That's why people are so ready for Christmas break. We miss our families, and the comfort of being home. I LOVE this. Nothing to me is greater than family, and even with tension in the extended family and awkward Thanksgiving or Christmas encounters ("No, I am not in a relationship yet...") we still want to go home. Dorothy was right, there truly is no place like home.

9). Some professors suck... period

Ugh, this was one of the first things that I learned in my first semester. After spending a week in the hospital, at least 2 of my professors gave me hell for it. It. was. awful.

I was not expecting to be out of school and in the hospital miles away from campus, and yet one of my professors told me when I returned that I shouldn't get points for turning in the assignment late, which, might I add was done IN the hospital on the HOSPITAL BED. Ridiculous.

I never understood why I am given a hard time for missing class (which is RARE, really.... I mean RARE) but someone who is always absent is let off the hook. Some professors just suck.

10).  Those high school friends? Hahaha 

Oh man. In my case, only one of my high school friends (my absolute best friend in the entire planet) went to college. One of the other "friends" got married and moved away. She complained to me that she didn't go to school and expected me to fix it, which I simply couldn't. It was her choice, not mine. The other friends I haven't heard from. And when I say friend here, I mean true friend.

I can go months without talking to my best friend (she's in Lansing for school) and we pick up right where we left off. There is never any awkwardness between us, and she accepts me for who I am, and I accept her for who she is. Overall, what I'm getting at here is that when you start college, those past friends may fade away... and nothing is wrong with that. You will be able to tell who your true friends are in no time.

11). It will seem like in all of your classes, everything is due at the exact same time

It's like your profs all get together and plan this... but they don't. and I'm not referring to the weeks around midterms or finals either.

12). Foreign language may be mandatory for your degree

This one is interesting, and may not really apply to you. When I signed up for classes I was told I would have to go up to the 2150 level of a foreign language, which is Intermediate 2. Why that is necessary for psychology specifically I'll never know.... but oh well. If this applies to you and you took a foreign language class in High school... take the placement test. Even if it gets you out of the introductory class it is totally worth it. Also a head's up.... make sure that your University has a good foreign language department... it makes allll the difference.


13). Here's a big one... even if you think that your major is one that is going to help the world later... some may not agree with you

"Psychology?? What do you expect to do with that?!"
"Psychology?? You know that you're going to at least need a Master's for that, right???"

Yes, I am well aware. Originally, when I told people that I wanted to study psychology in college before I even applied people were fine with it. No one made a stink about it, and no one tried to stop me. As soon as I started college, people began to question me, and even doubt how far I'd get and how helpful of a major it is to society.

Here's a thing for the haters out there about psychology majors.... if you believe that we are not necessary then you are part of the problem that we need to solve in society... don't worry, I'm not judging ;)

14). It's ok to not know what you want to study, or know and keep the specifics to yourself

I have witnessed some people who were unsure of what they wanted to study be encouraged to find the right path for them. If you are unsure, there is nothing wrong with that. As it is, it is crazy that as 18 year olds were are expected to figure the rest of our lives out before college. Take all the time you need.

If you do know what you want to study but don't want to give the details on how you'll apply your major to the work field then that is perfectly fine too. For example- engineering is a broad major. There is so much you can do with it, and it may take a little while to know exactly what subfield it is that you are interested in. Same with psychology; there is clinical, experimental, research, forensics, neuropsychology.. the list goes on and on. I know what I want to go specifically, but it's ok for me to not give the details. Surprise the people who have doubted you once you get there ;)

Aaaaand last but certainly not least...

Take time for yourself. Do not let anyone (especially if they aren't going to college) tell you how to live your life, what to study, or let them fool you into believing that their life is perfect.. it is not. Do what makes YOU happy. Do what YOU want to do for the rest of your life, it is your life after all.

~Katie